About Fluffy McGiggles

Greetings, reader! I am Fluffy McGiggles. In my world, I was an actress of the strongest sort, the melodramatic sort. Recently, I find myself confined to this... website, as its anthrompomorphization and personality. The Webmaster and I have a bit of a dispute as to how this should be run. The Webmaster can change anything I do, but I can also change anything the Webmaster does. However, the Webmaster can also delete me at will. So that means I'm temporarily behaving myself. This is my own choice, however, contrary to anything The Webmaster may say. So, don't blame me for the over-the-topness of the website. You have been warned.

Author Archives: Fluffy McGiggles

Super Bowls

I’ve said it before, and I’m sure I’ll say it again. Your world confuses me.

I originally tried to find any of my fellow websites that had information about ice worms. Instead, I found information about something completely different. This celebration totally swamped the other.

Apparently there was an event called “the super bowl.” And it’s apparently one of the most watched events in your country. But I do not understand it.

First of all, why is that event called “football”? I did not see people touch anything resembling a ball with their feet, except rarely. And why are there two types of football in your world? (I do notice that one of them actually makes sense. There’s a very obvious ball, and people kick it. With their feet. Hence, “football”.

Also, why are people punished for too much contact? Back home, we have fantastic tourneys. Oh, and that’s another thing. Where were the weapons? The only one I could see from what I could find in this universe was slightly oval-shaped. And brown. And it didn’t seem to do much harm. Was it valuable? Or does it explode?

I admit, I found the event of making a big deal out of partial illumination bizarre. Was not the stadium in total darkness but minutes before? And what was up with that? Do you consider those people performers? Where were their roles, their lines? The protagonists? And who was the enemy?

In other words, your world is very confusing to me.

Happy Ice Worm Day!

Greetings, my admiring fans!

Don’t get to presumptuous, Fluffy…

Please. I’m an actress. It’s what I do!

Anyways, as I was saying, greetings to you, my dear readers! I have recently come to realize that, as an actual website, I can explore this wonderful universe called “the Internet.” As such, I have tried to learn a bit about your world. I must say, you have some absolute surprises! For example, I had absolutely no idea that ice worms even existed on your world, much less that they have their own holiday!

Ice worms?

You did not know about these remarkable creatures? I assumed everybody knew about them!

It turns out, actually, that today is Ice Worm Day, from what I understand. Ice worms, according to my friend Wikipedia, are a remarkable creature that live in glaciers. Actually, if they get too warm, they melt. Where I come from, we have ice serpents. They too, melt. Actually, that causes quite the problem. If they are unwise and have too much fresh meat, they melt from the inside out. It’s quite nasty, actually.

But back to your world’s worms. Ice creatures of any sort are fascinating. I’m so pleased that your world gives them their own special day!

There are animals that actually melt?!

Excuse me while I try to forget about my fears of stepping in melted snake.

Huh. Not quite the reaction I expected. I’ll need to remember that melting creatures can cause that reaction; it might come in very handy. BWAHAHAHA!

Anyways, I hope you have a great day! And don’t worry, I’m sure that most of the snow you step in doesn’t actually hide any melting ice worms.

Legends from the Past

I have decided. I need some genuine content, not just the mindless fluff the Webmaster has forced upon me. For this reason, I will tell you a legend from my world.

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Legends from the Past

Once upon a time in a land far away a family discovered The Secret: a contraption, hidden in the deep. None knew how to work the device.

S’Ranya, the 16 year old daughter of the patriarch, was at the time blessed with the Sight of Knowledge. Upon the mysterious contraption’s discovery, she Saw part of its hidden secrets and knowledge. What she Saw was enough. Over it she pronounced a prophecy, and swore her family to its secrecy and protection.

For the fulfillment of this task, S’Ranya also studied the art of chest making. Study, she did, and to this talent she devoted much time. She worked to perfect the skill, and created boxes and chests of magic, beauty, and history.

Treasure Chest

One of S’Ranya’s Treasure Chests

In time, the Sight of Knowledge left her, and she married him of whom she had dreamed while the Sight was yet upon her.

And later, when the time was right, she bore a girl. This child, it was found, also had the Sight. For this reason, S’Ranya told taught her of the Secret, and trained her in the art of Making. Her daughter too then made the chests of magic, history, and secrecy until that time when the Sight left her as well.

And so it continued. Mother taught Daughter, and the entire family guarded the device. So it continued for 700 years.

~*~

In the day S’Ranjella of the line of S’Ranya came into her heritage, the Knowledge of the Contraption was revealed unto her in an intensity never before experienced.

She knew, even before her Mother’s instructions, what the Secret was. Further she saw what its purpose was, and that the time of the fulfillment of the prophecy was at hand.

With the Sight of Knowledge to guide her, S’Ranjella unbound the magical chests of her heritage, and revealed the device to her family. With it, she also revealed the full prophecy, for the time was right.

prophetic scroll

The Prophecy of the Line of S’Ranya

Of the coming end of their world, she spoke, and of the way to preserve the World’s history, and their family. The Secret had revealed all this.

On this topic she explained and instructed further. For the past 700 years, the device had remained dormant. In but a few hours, fueled by the approach of impending doom, the contraption would activate. It was a portal to another world, or maybe many worlds. Once the portal was open, then, the Family would escape the Doom of the World.

When the portal opened, S’Ranjella instructed, the members of her entire family were to take a quantity of their heritage of boxes, the boxes of history, magic, and safety, and enter through the portal. The portal would transport them Somewhere, to a place away from their World. Once they reached their new Home, in the Worlds Beyond, the family was to place an Item into each of the chests. The Item must be from their new world, for that would tie their family, and their heritage of treasure chests, to their new homes.

Upon receipt of the item, S’Ranjella further instructed, each chest was to be hidden away.  In time, their families would integrate into society, and the location of the chests would be forgotten, and stored only in memory, lore, and maybe maps. With this, the Family would live, as would the heritage of History, Magic, and Beauty of their world. All this S’Ranjella revealed unto her family.

What she did not reveal was the individual fates of each member of her family or the chests. She had not told them that they would never see each other again, for the portal would transport them to different worlds; different universes, even.

Once there, her family would use their skills for a good purpose. The sword-smiths of her families would equip noble adventurers and the magicians would heal many. From each of them would come a hero who would be inevitably drawn towards the chests, filled with magic from both Worlds of the hero’s heritage. This magic and heritage would call to him or her, and would serve a need of some sort.

With great sorrow in their hearts, for the end of the World was coming, S’Ranjella’s family followed these instructions. They found the many chests of their heritage, and went through the portal, one set of immediate family members at a time.

Finally, at the end, S’Ranjella looked up at the sky from whence the Doom would come, and followed, last of all.

 ~*~

In a universe far away, a child played a computer game. The protagonist in the game came across a treasure chest, and received an item. The hero in the world paused for a split second, and admired the chest. It was a thing of beauty, and before founding it, the thing had seemed to call to the hero. The protagonist touched the box lightly, and paused to remember the legends of the Treasures, and of the travelers from beyond the stars. Rumor had it that they were related.

Even though unsure of the truth of the matter, the hero reflected, and thanked whoever had hidden the chests for their generous gifts.

Thank you for reading! I feel a lot better for having some genuine content, not just fluff and nonsense.

“Not just fluff and nonsense”? Fluffy, you’re talking about portals to another world, there’s no dialogue, and you call this not “fluff and nonsense”?

Of course. This is a legend from my world. How could it be fluff and nonsense?

You’re talking about portals to another world.

I really fail to see what your problem is. After all, you’re talking to me. I came through a portal from another world…

What, no response from the Webmaster? I guess I’ve won.

Wait, what? No! I’m just speechless. And just to clarify… Are you saying that all treasure chests in our computer games and video games came from one family?

I’m not actually saying anything of the sort. I’m only saying that according to legend, yes. After all, the family made the treasure boxes for over 700 years. They’ve got to have a lot of them at this point.

Well, I’m still not buying it. But I guess that according to rules of Political Correctness, I can’t actually say that your legends seem to be very… fluffy.

Good thing you didn’t say it, then. After all, we’d hate for me to change any of your recipes.

Ack! Don’t you dare!

Well, I guess that means goodbye for now, readers. I’m going to make sure Fluffy didn’t ruin any of my recipes…

Oh good. I hoped that would get rid of her.

And I should probably let you go. After all, unlike me, you don’t necessarily spend your entire life on this website.

So fare thee well, dear reader, until I next see you.