Monthly Archives: August 2013

Whipped Cream

Note: If this is your first time to TotalFluff, please visit this brief explanation. Thanks!

Hello again, Fluffsters! I hope you’re having a good week. I’m having an excellent one so far. It’s being busy, exhausting, and very tiring, but it’s also being a lot of fun.

I was realizing, however, that I need some more varied “traditional fluff” on this page.

No. You really don’t.

Yes, actually, I really do.

That is why today I am going to talk about:

Things About Whipped Cream.

1) It qualifies as fluff. Even the densest whipped cream is smooth and airy. (If it isn’t, it doesn’t qualify.) It is, in fact, part of the definition of whipped cream.

What? It’s part of the definition?

Yes. I originally thought I’d need to make up the definition to match, but it turns out I don’t. It really is part of the definition!

2) It goes great with any type of summer fruit. Peaches, blueberries, strawberries…. The list could go on, but you get the picture I’m sure.

3) It goes well with other dairy products. Ice cream sundaes, for example, are amazing. Ice cream, whipped cream, and chocolate sauce. Yum. Banana splits with whipped cream are also phenomenal.

4) Whipped cream can be easy to make. All you really need is a blender. (preferably one with a seal-able lid.) Put whipping cream into the blender, sweeten to taste, and whip it until it turns light and fluffy.

5) There are a few interesting variations. My Dad, for example, always puts vanilla into his. That stuff is amazing. It’s almost like ice cream, but not quite. And that’s only in part because it’s not frozen. Other variations of his that are interesting, and can be really good, involve putting other flavors in. I don’t remember whether we’ve tried one with peppermint extract or not, but that would also be pretty amazing.

Other variations, of course, include the “industrial” kind that sometimes don’t even have real cream in them. (Koolwhip, I’m looking at you…) These do have their place, but they aren’t real whipped cream if they don’t have cream. Sometimes store bought whipped cream can be good, though.

And so, Fluffsters, whatever your take is on whipped cream, I hope you enjoy. Happy Wednesday!

The Most Annoying Things in the World

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Hello, Fluffsters! Happy Tuesday!

It’s even Tuesday as I’m writing this! How’s that for odd? But you’re not here for the random chatter, are you? I’m sure that you’re actually here to read about:

The Most Annoying Things In The World

4) Ear Bugs. As in the songs that get stuck in your head, of course. Those are annoying- they’re distracting when you’re trying to think ,and they just go through your head over and over and over again!

3) Faulty internet connections. I’m needing to use Google Chrome right now, because my internet (for some very strange reason) seems to have developed an allergy to Firefox. All my bookmarks and frequently visited pages are on Firefox, so this is a blasted nuisance, and very annoying. And I also fully admit that I’m fairly addicted to the internet. I like having a vast amount of information at my fingertips, and an easy way to communicate with people. (Such as you, through these posts!) It annoys me to no end when it doesn’t work properly.

2) Ending a movie 5-10 minutes before the end, and not being able to finish it. Especially when it’s a friend’s movie, and it’s fairly intense, and you’ve only seen it once before, and you can’t find the last few minutes on any legitimate/legal looking website, and you don’t remember all the specifics… In other news, I’ve seen the opening of How to Train Your Dragon about 3 times now… I’ve seen the ending only once. I would very much like to fix this…

1) Being interrupted in a good book. Frequently. Reading is very much like visiting a different land, especially with good books. The land might be identical to your current land in all ways except for the characters, but it’s still new. And then every time someone interrupts you, it forcibly jerks you out of that world. You no longer hear what the characters in the book are saying to you. And further more, interruptions are normally due to things like chores needing to be done. Not fun.

So, Fluffsters, what about you? Any annoying things you’d add to the list?

You mean besides the posts you sometimes write that have no actual content?

Uh, clearly… You wouldn’t be here if you truly found it one of the most annoying things in the world, right?

An Unexpected Use of Braids

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Hello, Fluffsters! Happy Monday!

My week is still looking pretty busy right now, but I’m going to try to write these Fluffs.

I did discover something, though.

Braids can be used in unexpected ways.

For example, I’ve recently been doing some hot, sweaty stuff that requires the frequent use of a pencil… That means that I’ve been using this hairstyle. The best part is that I can slide a pencil into one of the side braids. It then doesn’t get lost, and it’s there for when I need it. Pretty nice, right?

Braids are also great for getting hair off the back of your neck… mostly. Sometimes if you roll the braid into a bun, it will end up sort of at the top of your neck. It’s usually a lot less hot than if the hair were down, though. And braid height can be adjusted.

So, pencils. And pens, I guess. That’s my unexpected use of a braid… How about you? Do you put spikes into your braid so that it can be turned into a weapon? Or do you store a sword in there? Or do you do something completely different? (Maybe use it as a paint brush?) I’d love to hear about any unexpected uses of braids that you do!

3 rabbits picture

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Hello, Fluffsters! Yes, I’m back. At least temporarily. After Fluffy wrote about Hairless Cats for a “fluffy animals” series, I realized I’d reached the limits…

So today’s post is short, but at least it’s written by me.

I saw these fine fluffy fellows yesterday morning, and so I took a picture. Aren’t they cute?

3 cute bunnies by a building

Three Cute Rabbits

Happy Sunday!

Fluffy Animals: Hairless Cats

Note: If this is your first time to TotalFluff, please visit this brief explanation. Thanks!

Hello, Fluffsters… The Webmaster still hasn’t shown up, and so I guess I’m going to need to take drastic measures and write a post about something she’ll dislike.

Hairless Cats.

That’s right, hairless cats.

Now, you probably don’t normally think of them as fluffy, but you se-

Error: The Webmaster has deleted the rest of this post.

Wait… So I’m not allowed to delete posts, but you are?

Yup. My blog, my rules. That was a lousy topic. But I’m too busy to write a new post right now, so I’m afraid I’m going to need to leave it like this.

Happy Saturday, Fluffsters!

…Yeah. You’d think that if she showed up, she could at least do something useful. Oh well. Happy Saturday!

Fluffy Animals: Unicorns

Note: If this is your first time to TotalFluff, please visit this brief explanation. Thanks!

Ok, so there’s still no sign of the Webmaster.

Although I love the attention, if she keeps not showing up without warning, I might just stop writing these- it’s not as though I like the whole website, or anything.

Today, though, I will continue to create the fluff. I guess I will be able to once more capture Quality Fluff on this page.

Facts About Unicorns

This website, alas, does not actually own any photos of unicorns. But I do have experience with the equivalent creatures on my home world.

1) Yes, unicorns are fluffy. They are so fluffy, in fact, that unicorn fur is able to be spun and then woven into fabric.

2) Unicorn fur is really comfortable. It is, of course, waterproof and protects the skin from the sun. It is also both lightweight and basically climate controlled. In the summer, it seems like a cool fabric. In the winter, however, it is able to completely block out the wind and the cold. It is the best type of fur for warm clothing and for clothing during the warm months.

3) It has innate protective abilities. And not just against weather elements. Unicorn-fur fabric is both really strong and innately protective against magic. Any magic user that can afford them uses Unicorn Cloth as coverings when they work magic.

4) Unicorns are simple, but difficult, to catch. Fortunately for our world and magic users, both men and women can approach unicorns. The simplicity is that you simply need to find the unicorn’s home bunk and bring a diamond. Unicorns eat diamond, and so you need to bring a prime specimen. Once you find the Unicorn Home (which is usually fairly easy to find,) you present the diamond. If it is large enough and stunning enough, the unicorn will approach and trade its fur for the diamond. (By trading its fur, the unicorn basically just sheds its top coat. No harm is done to the unicorn.) It’s a painless process for the unicorn to give its fur.

5) Many wizards must make their own unicorn cloth to become Grand Masters. At least, that is how legend goes. Nobody who is not a wizard actually knows what goes on at the academy. According to urban legend, advanced magic users must complete a series of trials to be considered Grand Masters of the Magical Arts. Unicorns are very picky about what diamonds they accept- diamond-made are preferred. Any wizard who wants to be a Grand Master, then, needs to confront a dragon in order to get the diamond. Or have a lot of money. If a wizard can make his or her own Unicorn Cloth, the assumption is that the wizard has done enough to be considered a Grand Master.

There are a few instances when it’s not enough. The wizard does need to receive the fur directly from the unicorn, you see. But that sort of step-around usually doesn’t happen.

There you go! I hope you enjoyed the peak into life on my home world. Happy Weekend!

Fluffy Animals: Cows

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Really? Three days in a row that The Webmaster hasn’t written a post? Well, I can’t pass this up.

Unfortunately, my stock of unexpectedly fluffy animals is about dry. I guess this means I’ll need to go with more conventionally fluffy animals:


Yes, cows. I might have done something on a platypus, but there aren’t any photos of them on this website.

So cows.

1) They can be very furry. The one photo this website has is of a particularly furry calf. It’s rather charming, actually.

Furry Cow

Isn’t the cow cute?

This is apparently a Highland Cow.

Highland cows are native to some of the colder regions of your world. They have fluff, though, and therefore qualify as a fluffy animal.

2) Cows give whipped cream. After a process, of course, which involves shaking the cow a lot before milking it.*

3) Similarly, if you freeze a cow before milking it, you get ice cream. If you shake the frozen cow, you get a milkshake.**

*Please don’t actually shake your cow before milking it.

**Please don’t do these either.

4) If you can lift a cow daily from the time it is born you will be able to lift a cow. That is the truth. It might be a miniature cow. It might be a stuffed cow. But if you lift it, you can lift it.

5) Cows are fairly boring. Especially when they charge at you. Have you seen how sharp their horns can be? They can bore a hole right through you!

And so, Fluffsters, I hope you have a wonderful day.

Fluffy Animals: Skunks

Note: If this is your first time to TotalFluff, please visit this brief explanation. Thanks!

Huh. It looks like the Webmaster still isn’t writing the post. I guess I’ll take over again.

I guess this does give me a bit of an opportunity to continue the odd-animal portion of her fluffy animals series. So…

Fluffy Animals: Skunks

I think that everyone will even agree with me that these animals are fluffy.

A cute looking skunk

Isn’t he cute?

So, here we go.

1) Skunks are fluffy. I think nobody can deny this. They’ve got long fur, and it looks nice, thick, and soft. I think Peeves might be jealous. The fur helps them survive the winter months in comfort. The dark in their fur helps them blend in at night, while the white helps them not become roadkill. Or so I understand.

2) Even with their distinctive markings, skunks still confuse people. I know that there are people who think skunks are a type of cat. Furthermore, some cats think skunks are a type of cat. I heard about a cat that once was very interested in a skunk… Clearly not the brightest of all cats.

3) Wild dogs only need to be sprayed by a skunk once. Afterwords, the animal will steer clear of all skunks in the future. I know that some folks complain about domesticated dogs not learning. There’s a simple reason for that- domesticated dogs still get fed after getting sprayed. In the wild, the stench prevents the canine from catching anything. So not only does the dog smell bad, it also goes hungry until the scent wears off. Aren’t skunks amazing?

4) If their scent is removed, skunks make great pets. I’m not too surprised. A picture demonstrates why- skunks just look so cheerful with people.

A skunk about to jump off of a perch

I wonder where he wants to go…

Doesn’t the little one up there look a bit puppyish or catlike?

5) Skunks show up in more full-length Disney movies than duck-billed platypuses. According to what I was able to find. Finally, a mark in favor of the universally disliked skunks!

Happy Wednesday, Fluffsters!

Fluffy Animals: Porcupines

Note: If this is your first time to TotalFluff, please visit this brief explanation. Thanks!

Do I believe my eyes? Have I actually started a new post before the Webmaster? Fantastic!

Well, Fluffsters, happy Tuesday! I hope you’re having an excellent week. Due to the Webmaster’s absence, probably due to her continuing vacation, I will be infiltrating her post today. And so, here’s a post about:

Fluffy Animals: Porcupines.


Yes, you read that correctly.

Now, granted, porcupines are not the traditional “fluffy animal.” I think that’s a pity. From what I have read, they are quite charming animals, really!

A fluffy porcupine eating a carrot.

Look at the porcupine eating a carrot. Isn’t that darling?

Ok, so if you pet them it’s a problem. But here are some reasons why they are awesome:

1) Their fluff is dangerous. How cool is that? They can prance along, humming gently to themselves, looking adorable, and have an automatic defense system built in! Sweet, huh? It just proves that fluff doesn’t have to be useless.

(No, I’m not trying to prove a point to the Webmaster… What makes you say that?)

2) They live in trees. Seriously. Porcupines live in trees. I don’t know if I can repeat that often enough. Who would have expected that? So, not only do they have spiky fluff (unlike many mammals), they also live in trees. It’s as though they went out of their way to protect themselves. Point two for fluff not being useless! (But who’s keeping track?)

3) They’re happy critters. Of course, if your fluff is dangerous, and you live in a blinkin’ tree, what do you have to be upset about?

Happy looking prancing porcupine.

4) Porcupines are fun in any form. Especially real life, but also in crochet form. I mean, isn’t that amusing? (And aren’t they clearly fluffy?)

5) Carrots are a porcupine’s best friend. That get eaten, and then are gone. So clearly they are not best friends forever, but they still look so cheerful together!


Cheerful looking porcupine eating a carrot.

6) Despite their terrifying fluff, porcupines are (mostly) harmless. After all, they are not carnivores. That’s right, your little kitties are possible more dangerous than a pet porcupine. You never hear or read about people feeding mice to their pet porcupines, do you? Clearly, then, they are significantly less deadly to small rodents.

And so, Fluffsters, I wish you a joyous Tuesday.

Fluffy Animals: Kitties!

Note: If this is your first time to TotalFluff, please visit this brief explanation. Thanks!

Hello, Fluffsters! And welcome back to today’s edition of Fluffy Animals!

Oh goody. I’m soo thrilled.

Oh, good! I’m glad somebody is.

Why do I even try sarcasm. Why do I even try?

Today’s Fluffy Animal post is…


Yes, what kind of blog about fluff would this be if I didn’t have a post devoted to man’s worst enemy, the cat?

… Worst enemy? Really?


I mean, think about it. You see articles and books on how to tell if your cat is trying to kill you. You don’t see that sort of thing with dogs.

But I digress.

Information about kitties

1) They are cute. Especially when younger. After all, the only problem with kittens is that they eventually turn into cats.

Cute kitten which will, alas, turn into a cat.

Cute kitten!

2) They are useful for rodent control. Of course, if you love rodents, this is another problem. You wouldn’t want your kitten to kill a Marmot, would you?

3) Intelligence of conversation decreases as a kitten gets closer. XKCD says so, and they wouldn’t lie to us, right?

So, there you go! Happy Monday.

Seriously? That’s it?

It’s after midnight my time as I’m writing this, and I’m getting up too early my time tomorrow, which is when this is going to be posted. So, yes. I’m not responsible-

-Boy is that ever true-

-for the rest of this post. You can write more, I suppose…

All right, I will!

After all, you left out some of the best parts.

Fluffy’s perspectives on Kitties

1) They are awesome carnivores. Unlike dogs, they don’t eat carrots. At least, normal cats don’t.

2) They come in all sorts of shapes and sizes. I kid you not. There are huge cats, medium sized cats, and very small cats.

3) Some cats are celebrities. Take Grumpy Cat, for example. I’m sure you’ve heard of him her. (Can you really believe that Grumpy Cat is female? That just seems very odd. She looks like she should be male.) Or Nyan Cat.

4) Some “wildcats” are extremely cute. In fact, I’m not sure whether Ocelots and Horpadies might actually share some sort of purpose in life- being really cute and deadly at the same time.

And that is a much more reasonable fluff post- don’t you agree? I fully realize that I left many details about cats uncovered, but I think it’s still significantly better than how the Webmaster was originally going to leave it.