Pudding Miles

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Hello, Fluffsters!

I am really happy right now.

Why? Did you find another abysmal music video that you-don’t-really-think-is-offensive-despite-your-claims?

Not recently, no.

Actually, I’m happy about something I’d been unaware of that happened about 13 years ago.

Apparently, some guy found a loophole in a airline mile competition, and so got over a million airline miles… by buying pudding.

Stories like that make me happy. With a little ingenuity, and a lot of hard work, a guy was able to receive a lot. Further, it apparently didn’t actually cause many problems to the companies. All three parties (the airlines, the food company, and the person who bought the food) all ended up benefiting. Granted, it wasn’t the expected result for the company. But even so, they ended up with a lot of publicity because of this!

…you people.

What?

Just… never mind.

… Okay! Well, happy Tuesday, folks! I hope you have a great one.

Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster?

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Once again… what is up with your world?

The Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster? Really?

Uh, no idea. I hadn’t heard of it. It looks like a spoof of religion, though… Just judging from their definite admission of being legitimate. The church doth protest too much, methinks. Or something like that.

And a flying spaghetti monster? I’m with you Fluffy… That’s just absurd.

Thank you! I hope you’re right…

Movie Review: Monty Python Trailer

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Hello, Fluffsters!

Yesterday, I saw one of the more amusingly epic things that I’ve seen in a while.

Oh no. Please tell me there’s not something that’s rivaling the fox song…

Oh, no. This isn’t a music video- it’s a trailer.

A… trailer? That’s what you’re excited about right now?

Well, you see, it’s not just a trailer. It’s a trailer of a movie that’s already been made, and that’s already a comedic classic. I’m talking, of course, about the Monty Python and the Holy Grail Modern Trailer that came out last Tuesday. (September 10.)

That actually doesn’t look to bad. Are you sure it’s a funny trailer?

Absolutely. The trailer is so serious, and for a movie that’s extremely ridiculous.

…The movie isn’t a serious movie?

Monty Python? Oh my, no. That’s the movie that brings you such lines as “Help, help, I’m being repressed!” and “Are you suggesting that coconuts migrate?” Trust me, it’s one of the sillier popular motion pictures around. In fact, with it being so silly, I’m very impressed with…

Ways the ‘modern trailer’ made Monty Python and the Holy Grail look like a serious movie…

1) The opening music. The combination of chorale and open-sounding percussion makes the tone a compelling adventure type sound.

2) The drum interjections. Throughout the course of the trailer, an emphatic beat comes in to emphasize “drama!” Since there are a few scenes in the movie that look dramatic, whoever made this trailer was able to take those, and emphasize the “Hey, this move looks awesome!” factor and make it appear that the entire movie is like that.

3) Other musical interjections. About thirty seconds in, there’s a rumbly-grindy-modern-y sounding noise reminiscent of rocks tumbling. This sound against the backdrop of a castle gives the impression that there will be epic sieges, possibly including tumbling castles.

3) The “subtitles”. “In a Kingdom of Despair…” some hovering text reads… This is remarkably similar to movie trailers like the one for “Master and Commander…” again, a dramatic serious film. Also, when you label something “kingdom of despair” and have dark music playing, people are going to believe that you mean it. Not that there are peasants who are basically Marxists, and provide a marvelous commentary on politics.

4) The out-of-context epicness. “There is a pestilence upon this land! Nothing is sacred!” “What is your name? And what is your quest?” and “I seek the finest and the bravest knights in the land to join me in my court at Camelot” all sound fantastic… outside of the movie. In the movie, those are actually usually followed by a fair bit of laughter from the audience. Similarly with all the sword fights.

All of those things combine to make a marvelous trailer that, while technically true, is so misleading it is hilarious. I highly recommend this trailer.

BRRRAAAAIIINSSSS!

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Hello, Fluffsters!

Yesterday, I had a fun opportunity. I got to serve a creepy brain jello!

What’s that you’re saying? “It’s just jello, how can it possibly be creepy?”

I’m glad you asked.

Actually, they didn’t…

Oh, come on. I can pretend, can’t I?

As I was saying, I’m glad you asked. It can be creepy… like THIS!!

creepy gray brain jello with gummy worms sticking out

Creepy, right?

Isn’t that nasty looking?

So… is this the next “mold is good” thing with you?

Technically, yes, since I do have a jello mold to thank for this.

But as I was saying, isn’t that creepy? I love making this thing. The jello itself is peach flavored. The gummy worms are sour, which gave the jello a bit of a slightly interesting flavor. There’s also (fat free) evaporated milk in it, which is what makes it semi-opaque. It also slightly changes the consistency to be a bit more… solid. The stuff really feels about like what you’d expect chilled brain consistency to be.

People’s reactions to it are absolutely priceless. Some will stare at it in horror. Others will take the gummy worms sticking out of the jello, and therefore eat the gray stuff that comes with it. And a few brave souls will take large quantities of it and delight in eating “brains.”

Everybody who tries it likes the flavor. (After all, it’s jello. Peach jello. It’s not actually that weird.) At the same time, however, most people think it a bit… disgusting. Especially if they think about the fact that it’s “brains” they’re eating. I love having the opportunity to make and serve it.

And I think I really do not want to know what constitutes a good time to make a dessert that looks like a human organ. A worm infested human organ.

Ok, fine. Spoilsport.

Happy Saturday, though! I hope you’re having a great weekend!

Questions about the new Harry Potter Universe Movie

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Hello, Fluffsters! So…

I am so excited right now! J.K. Rowling is writing a screenplay for Warner Brothers, based on her book Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them!

This is going to be fantastic. I loved the book. Seriously. Alright, so part of it was because supposedly Ron, Harry, and Hermione had left notes in the margins, which added great witty commentary. I’m fairly sure this movie will be interesting, though.

And there are definitely some things I’m curious about with this new movies.

Questions I’m hoping will be answered

1) What is wizarding life like in America? According to the article, it starts in New York. That’s fantastic! Will we get to see any Quodpot? (The American version of Quidditch.) Do American wizards still wear robes? If so, what do they look like? I can’t wait to see!

2) When will this be released?! Is this something I should be looking for next year? Do I have time to save up money and audition for a part? (Speaking of which, how hard would it be to audition for the part of a patronus? Or a unicorn or thestral? Either of those three could be amusing to play…)

Wait, you’re trying to become an actress? That’s my job. Besides, the parts you just listed are CG. Or they’re going to find live animals.

Spoilsport.

3) Do American wizarding foods differ? Ok, so this could go under the “Questions about Wizarding Life in America” section. But it kind of deserves its own question, don’t you think? But I’m straying from the point. In Britain, they have Chocolate Frogs and Berty Botts. Do Americans as well? Or have the American wizards taken those foods and “perfected” them? (Do wizard fairs have deep-fried chocolate-frog-legs? That would be amusing… Or deep fried butterbeer? I know that deep fried coca cola is a thing where I’m originally from. On a stick, of course.) What would a wizard’s hamburger look like, too? Or pizza? Do they do special tricks with the pizza dough, since you can make things fly and whatnot?

4) What about “current events?” If this movie is taking place seventy years before Harry Potter, that would put it in the 1920s. There’s a lot of culture that everyone knows about from the ’20s. Will we get to see any of that? Does Newt know Gatsby?

Well, those are some of my questions. What about you? (Oh, and happy Friday! It’s now the weekend, yay!)

Octopi

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Greetings, Fluffsters! I hope you are well.

I am not feeling particularly inclined to write too much today, but the Webmaster has put enough fluff and nonsense onto this blog to last the rest of the week. Because of that, I will be posting a link to an interesting article here.

This is an article with video footage about octopi. They’re really fascinating creatures.

I recommend that you look at it.

Happy Thursday!

Nailpolish!

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Hello, Fluffsters! I’m not feeling particularly verbose today, but I am feeling inspired.

So today’s post is going back to the original view of this blog, before I met Fluffy… (Warning: Girly-ness alert…)

Here’s a picture of some nail art I did.

Red nail polish with some dice effects

Nail-polish meets the Webmaster

This is probably one of the easiest “steps beyond basic” doable. There are a total of 4 polishes (3 if you don’t count the clear layer on top.)

I started with a sparkly red base coat, (yay sparkles!), put some thicker glitter on the ends, and then used a home-made dot-tool to put little white dots on in shapes reminiscent of dice spots.

I’m basically did this tonight a) because I wanted to, and 2) because I’m planning on wearing a red blouse tomorrow to my ballroom dance class. Also because I’ve seen some amazing nail art things, and I figure I need to get better at even applying normal polish normally before I can start doing things like “galaxy nails.”

How about you, Fluffsters? Do anything fun artsy-wise recently?

Hooray, this made the news…

Hello, Fluffsters!

Everybody can relax now- the United States ranking 17 in the most happy nations of the world qualified as a valid news article. Now all that we need to wait for is the breaking news article about how Iceland ranks in the world for Number of People Who Wear Green.

Where did that come from?

The internet…

No, not the article. The “Green” ranking. And Iceland?

Do you have something against Iceland?

No, I just don’t see how that question makes any sens-

Well, happy Tuesday, Fluffsters! I hope you have a good day.

Analysis of why “The Fox” song might be offensive

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Hello, Fluffsters!

I’ve been thinking about the fox song that was talked about in yesterday’s post, and I realized I may have been wrong about it.

You’ve come to the realization that it’s a bad song?

Maybe. In fact, it might actually be fairly offensive, when you stop to think about it.

Because it insults your intelligence? Don’t many things in life do so?

What? No! That is to say, I’m not offended by “the fox song insulting my intelligence.”

On the contrary, it just communicates at a brainier level than most expect.

Why am I suddenly getting the feeling that I don’t want to know where this is going?

I don’t care.

Here’s why I think this song is potentially offensive: after thinking about it, I realized that foxes are typically thought of as introverted type creatures. According to wikipedia, they typically live alone.

Many of the other animals mentioned throughout the song (dogs, cows, elephants, and birds, for example) live in groups. By using the groupish animals as a type of counterexample, the composers are clearly setting this song up as a contrast between two groups: Extroverts (group lovers), versus introverts (solitary types).

Uh, are you sure you’re not reading too much into thi-

Now, that simple classification itself isn’t too much of a problem. As I’ve ranted about earlier, people tend to try to put others into boxes. It’s annoying, but that’s not the purpose of this rant.

No. The purpose of this rant is threefold, because the song can be seen as insulting both introverts and extroverts. And animals.

Now I’m just confused. Again.

Actually, Fluffy, it’s not that complicated. Here is my analysis:

How The Fox Song Can Offend Animals.

As I mentioned earlier in the post, the singer goes through and talks about different types of animals, and what they say. He then goes on to talk exclusively about the fox. This dismissal doesn’t qualify as equal opportunity for all animals. In fact, there are a number of animals he doesn’t even mention that have equally perplexing noises, or lack thereof. What about the giraffe, for example? Why don’t they have their own song? Or chorus line? And how about parrots, too? They’re great imitators- what are their natural noises? Does anyone truly know? How do we know that parrots’ natural noises haven’t been tainted by child birth? But do they even get mentioned? No!

And then the fox itself. The artist doesn’t even try to be reasonable with what the fox might say. Furthermore, they use what must be a computer generated fox to indicate what they really think sound like. All foxes that watch that video will likely feel insulted.

Of… course.

And then there’s the introvert/extrovert aspect.

Why the fox song might upset extroverts.

Extroverts. They love groups and attention, right? Well here, they only get a second on camera. Tops. They’re introduced, given a single line, and then dismissed. This is unfair. Why can’t extroverts have more camera time?

Also, they’re being so casually dismissed. By indicating that we know what the extroverted animals say, that says we know all that we need to about those creatures. If you further that argument to extroverts in general, you’re indicating that you know exactly what an extrovert is going to say all the time, and that it doesn’t matter! That’s very offensive! It also indicates that what people say is all that matters. Well, whatever happened to “actions speak louder than words,” Mr. Ylvis?

Ylvis also presents foxes as mysterious, and therefore awesome. The others are presented as unmysterious, and therefore uninteresting.

Now Webmaster, I really don’t think the song was meant to be viewed that wa-

But that’s not all.

Why the song could offend introverts.

The entire song is about trying to get someone (who doesn’t want to say anything) to speak.

By choosing a fox, which is one of the more introverted type of animals, Ylvis plainly decided to make this a metaphor for all introverts.

Clearly…

That means that all the artist says about foxes is meant to apply to introverts.

So when Ylvis sings “What does the fox say?”, he’s actually saying “What do introverts say?”

Now, on the surface this doesn’t appear to be an entirely offensive question. But upon deeper analysis, the true intent can be seen, and thus indicate the potentially malicious idea behind this. In reality, there are at least two problems behind this question.

The first, and the most obvious one, is the inherent idea that Ylvis deserves to know what you’re saying. He’s not saying, “please, dear introverts, would you tell me what you’re thinking? Or what you’d like to say?” No. Instead he’s writing a song, comparing introverts to a single type of animal, demanding to know what introverts are saying. (Side note: That also seems to imply that he thinks introverts speak an entirely different language. Thanks a lot.)

The next problem, and one that can only be understood by the greater context of the song, is the indication that all introverts think exactly alike. The analysis here is also fairly straightforward. The composer uses many different types of extroverted animals, all of which say something different. Now, the composer just uses a single fox, to represent all the shy introverted people. He clearly thinks they must all say the same thing.

I don’t think I’ve encountered anyone else reading this much into that song. It’s certainly not that bad a song! It just insults the intelligence of the listeners. Seriously, just sto-

That’s not all, though. Oh, no.

The artist then tries to come up with ideas for what the introverts foxes might say. Or so they claim. In reality, can anyone deny that they’re just using this as an opportunity to make fun of the quiet folks, by making up loud obnoxious things that introverts clearly would not say, and are thus trying to bully all quiet people into conforming to the artist’s standards?

As I said, the song could easily be considered offensive.

…You don’t actually believe what you just wrote, do you? Please tell me you realize that the song did not intend to say all that you just said it said? And that it’s biggest problem is its lack of content, not its overabundance of it?

Of course I don’t! I just wanted to rant about it in a way that you’d be forced to defend the song.

WHAT? That is so not fair.

Funny, though. And it worked, didn’t it? You did claim the song wasn’t actually that bad.

Anyways, Fluffsters, happy Monday! I hope you have a good one.

“The Fox”…

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Your world… I’ve said it before, I’ll say it again. WHAT IS UP WITH THE PLANET EARTH?

Uh, wow Fluffy! That’s a little more energetic than usual. What’s the cause of the outburst this time?

The song “The Fox.”

That’s what’s up.

Uh… “The Fox”?

Yes. This.

…That’s sort of catchy. And cute.

And that is what I just don’t get about your world…

What? It’s sort of silly, and very random. And it’s actually sort of charming how the singer pronounces the Duck’s noise more like “Quahk” rather than the traditional “Quack.”

But… it has no content!

Oh, at least it’s better than “Friday.” This song, at least, raises a valid question. What does the fox say? And besides that, much of what it says at the beginning is fairly accurate. You know, at least from our perspective.

It goes through and lists animal noises at the beginning. And then goes on for the rest of the song talking about what the fox might possibly say. Including whether or not foxes would communicate with horses by morse. Seriously. What is going on?

Well, what other language rhymes with “horse”? “Norse?” That’s just plainly idiotic. No fox would speak Norse.

But they might speak morse code? And horses might speak morse as well?

In the songwriters’ defense, they never claim that horses communicate back through morse.

…right. And that makes everything better.

Oh, good! I’m glad I could help.

What? No! I wasn’t serious.

Oh. My bad.

But the fox song apparently does raise a valid point. At least according to Wired.

Fine. I’ll just accept that your world is confusing, and try to let it go at that.

Good plan, that.

Especially since it’s the only one I can come up with. Well, that’s enough for right now. But anyways, Fluffsters, what are your reactions to the song “The Fox”?