Tag Archives: real world

“Food” fluff, part 2

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Hello, Fluffsters!

Once again, be prepared to be amazed by the “cooking prowess” of the cafeteria I have regular access to. For indeed, I bring you

Fluff Dessert, part 2.

Yes, Fluffsters, this is a Sequel to the Infamous Lemon Dessert.

Infamous? Really?

…I can dream, right?

But yes. The dessert I’m talking about tonight actually comes from about a week ago. But that’s ok. Better late than never, right? (Don’t answer that, Fluffy.)

The dessert, you see, is “Caramel Apple No Bake Cheesecake.” (Good to know- the flavor certainly didn’t give it away…)

A gooey substance labeled "Caramel Apple No Back Cheesecake."

Caramel Apple No Bake Cheesecake. It’s the bottom one. On the right. Good thing I took a picture, or I still wouldn’t have known what it was…

I encourage you to click the image above to appreciate its full gooey “good”ness(?).

Naturally, think of you, dear Fluffsters, I got some.

It didn’t taste bad. It tasted like some sort of cream-cheese & graham-cracker dessert, which is to be expected. There were some confusing lumps in it, which at this point I’m guessing were apples of some sort. It did not taste particularly caramelly or appley. It was somewhat sweet, and a bit sour, which I guess is expected of cheesecake.

The name, though. That’s one of the other perplexing things. Ok, it may have had cream-cheese in it. It was also probably slightly caramel or apple flavored. But no-bake cheesecake? That’s definitely confusing. It’s not in cake form by any stretch of the imagination. It wasn’t baked, though, so I guess that part works. But seriously. “Cake”? Where’s the cake part? No-bake Cheese pudding would work. Cake still does not.

A not particularly cakeish dollop of the "cheesecake."

Scary, isn’t it? And not particularly cakelike.

But I’m getting off track, aren’t I?

Oh well. Yes. So the flavor wasn’t bad. Again, I wouldn’t suggest you actually pay anything for it, unless you’re in a mood for something with cream-cheese and this is the only option. The texture on this as well was also perplexing.

Here are some illustrations of what you can do to it with a fork:

A goupy substance stuck to a fork hovering above a plate.

Yes, the fork is above the plate. Yes, that consistency slightly scared me.

Another angle of the Fork & Goo

So, all said and done, unless you’re really craving a cream cheese & graham cracker combination, or unless you’re writing a blog about it, I don’t recommend getting this stuff. It didn’t taste bad, in fact it was significantly better than the lemon dessert, but it’s still very odd.

Happy Thursday!

A study in contrasts…

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Hello, Fluffsters!

At dinner last night, there was a rather amusing incident. So, I was having dinner at the cafeteria, and a friend came over, and greeted my with a “Greetings, my Lady, how art thou this fine evening?”

I was about to reply with “Quite well, my Lord. And thyself?” (or something along those lines) when I was interrupted by a different greeting- “I HONK IN THY GENERAL DIRECTION!!”

Two things come to mind concerning this incident.

1) I have great friends. Yes, both of the greetings this evening included King James style English. (Thees, thous, thys…) They may also be slightly weird. I think that my friend who greeted me with the “my Lady” honorific might have been referencing the fact that I tease him about being royalty, due to a role he played in a skit at one point, and another incident or two involving him (and his family) being royalty, or close to it.

So… If I tell you that I played royalty in some of my performances, will you start treating me deferentially?

Not unless I can see the play/skit. And not if I think it will go to your head.

Darn.

So yes. Great friends.

The other thing that comes to mind more immediately is 2) what a great study in contrasts! Even with the semi-attempts at using “formal English” (thees, thous, etc.), there are obvious differences. It was actually very amusing. One was a gallant, formal greeting that used the “thou” to sound more formal, even though it’s technically the “informal” from formal English. Which actually made it classier, somehow. The other greeting was designed to be amusingly obnoxious, and deliberately used the informal “thy”.

What can I say? I love my friends.

Mislabeled Desserts

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My cafeteria is confusing. Or confused. Or both.

You mean the place that served the mysterious “Lemon Dessert“?

Yes. This was at lunch today.

Supposedly the desserts are “Danish”, “Cinnamon rolls”, and “Cranberry Muffins.”

Those are supposed to be danishes, cinnamon rolls, and cranberry muffins? Your world does those very differently from mine…

Maybe not. I think I’m equally confused.

Well, happy Sunday, fluffsters! I hope you have an excellent week.

Encounters with Wildlife

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Hello, Fluffsters!

The other day I had a wildlife encounter.

Oh?

Yes. I ran into some wildlife, and I took a picture that I’m going to share with you.

a fuzzy caterpillar. aka, the wildlife encounter

My Wild Life Encounter

It’s a slightly freaky, very furry caterpillar. In a rampage.

…That’s your definition of wildlife? A rampaging caterpillar?

Well, it counts. It’s not domestic!

I guess you have me there.

Well, happy Saturday! I hope you have a great one!

More “food” questions…

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Hello, Fluffsters! Happy Friday!

Yesterday, I once again had an experience with the dessert section where I currently am. This time, I thought the experience was amusing, moreso than disgusting. It had to do with assorted desserts. Here’s what I saw (arrows added by me. Of course.):

I guess there are only two assorted desserts…

I would normally assume that “assorted desserts” applied to the whole tray, and that you don’t need more specifics, but apparently the folks in charge disagreed. To make matters even more annoying, one of the things I was actually curious about qualified as one of the two “assorted desserts.”

Well, that’s about all I wanted to post about today. Have a great weekend! (May your dessert endeavors be more successful than mine…)

Fuzzy Slippers (2)

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Hello, Fluffsters! Happy Wednesday! Wow, can you believe it’s Wednesday again already?

Anyways. Today, I’m continuing the series from yesterday, and writing about:

Fuzzy Slippers (part 2)

Slippers with and without “sticky” Soles

Yes, that’s my next set of “two” comparisons. You can either get slippers with high friction stuff on them, or not. The amount of non-friction stuff you get also varies.

All-rubber Soled Slippers.

These have their place. They are not always too objectionable, either. In fact, my main pair of genuine slippers has rubber soles.

There are several advantages to this type of slipper.

1) You don’t fall on wood or tile floors. That, of course, is usually a plus.

…Usually?

Right. Usually. I’m sure there are certain instances when people would want to fall. Gravity checks, for example.

Ok, you’ve got me. What are “gravity checks”? Is that when

Heavens, no! Gravity checks are a public service whereby a person limits muscle control in order to ensure that gravity is still working. At the same time, they also usually end up examining the floor.

You mean they fall down.

That’s a less graceful way to put it, but yes. So, rubber soled slippers make gravity checks a bit harder. But moving on.

2) Sturdy soles allow you to wear your slippers outside. This allows you to use your slippers as props for movies. After all, how are you going to film a movie in Suburbia if you can’t go get your newspaper in your bath robe and slippers?

That’s about it for the advantages of sticky soles that I can think of.

Partially Sticky Soled Slippers

Basically, there are two advantages.

1) fewer accidental gravity checks, and

2) they take less room than the completely sticky-soled slippers. (Try saying that quickly three times in a row!) But it’s true. There are some slippers that have just a little bit of flexible, sticky stuff on the soles. These are still very compact slippers, and take less room than the full-rubber-soled slippers that cannot bend.

Non-Sticky-Soled Slippers

Aren’t these normally referred to as “socks”?

…They’re fuzzier than most socks. So maybe, but it doesn’t matter. They still have advantages. Such as:

1) SLIPPER SLIDING!! If you can stand on a slippery surface somewhere, you can also slide on it. Just take a running start, and… SLIDE! Fluffy slippers like that are the best for sliding.

2) Extra-Super-Hyper-Compact. These are slippers you can take with you anywhere. In fact, you probably should take them with you wherever you go, since they can also serve as packing material! Do you have a book you don’t want getting crushed? Pack your slippers around them! Do you want a pillow? Lean back against a slipper!

WHAT? No. Just no. That’s gross.

Ok, yeah. Maybe you shouldn’t use them as a pillow.

Packing material is still legit though.

So there you go, Fluffsters! I hope you enjoyed the analysis of this dichotomy of fuzzy slippers. Have a great rest of your weak!

Fuzzy Slippers part 1

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Hello, Fluffsters! Happy Tuesday!

I don’t think there’s been enough fluff on this blog recently-

-I beg to differ-

-so I’m going to add more traditional fluff today. In other words, today is about:

Fuzzy Slippers.

Fuzzy slippers are fantastic. They’re soft, they’re warm, and they’re fluffy. That all combines to make a valid post, don’t you agree? Wait, don’t answer that.

Fuzzy slippers can be categorized in several basic ways. There are several sets of “two types”, and I’m going to go through the first one today.

Slippers that are animal-like, and slippers that are not animal-like.

Slippers that are animal-like. These are your traditional bunny slippers, Bear Paw slippers, or anything else that is reminiscent of an animal.

These are fun, since they give you a sense of nostalgia. You can pretend that you’re back in the days of yore, when people hunted to make clothes, and your shoes might actually have come from real, soft luxurious fur of an animal that would kill you if you don’t turn it into slippers first.

They can also lend courage. Would the monsters in the closet attack a bear? Of course not! So the monsters clearly wouldn’t attack you if you wore bear slippers.

Uh, the monsters in the closet don’t generally attack at all… And what about the rabbit slippers you mentioned?

Bunny slippers are also good. They can serve as decoys. After all, the monsters wouldn’t need to climb into your bed to get to you.

No matter what your style, if you’re looking for protection on cold winter nights, Animal Slippers will not let you down.

But what if you’re looking for something stylish? Something you can wear outside, and use to celebrate the new day as you get your newspaper, and is stylish enough to not get you laughed at by the neighbors? That, my friends, is where the other type of slippers in this category come in.

Non-Animalian Fuzzy Slippers. For those of you who fondly remember your bunny slippers, or other animalish slippers, but need something more stylish, fear not! Solutions exist!

There are some delightful slippers that have no resemblance to animals, but will still protect your feet from the cold. They may not make as decent decoys for the monsters in your closet, but not everyone is cursed with closets linking to the monsters’ home dimension. In such cases, you can wear your stylish non-animal slippers, and still be comfortable.

Further, if your reason for avoiding animal slippers is that you dislike animals, there are solutions for you, too! Even if you have monsters in your room that you need to be protected from, you do not need to resort to animal slippers.

You could get hobbit-feet slippers, which are sure to lead you not only “there” but also back again. (“There” is an adventure, and “back again” implies safety.) You can get car slippers with working headlights, which would protect you from anything you might come up against in the night. You could even get cupcake slippers, which might provide an even better decoy for the Closet Monsters than the bunnies! Monsters’ greatest weaknesses are cupcakes, after all.

I’d never heard that about Monsters before… Do you even have monsterologists on your world?

…Uh… I’ll get back to you on that.

Well, that’s all for right now! I hope that you’ve started to learn a bit about slippers. After all, I personally think that everyone should have at least one pair of slippers.

Have a great day!

What if Lightsabers were real?

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Greetings, Fluffsters! I wish you all a joyous Saturday.

The online phenomenon you call “news” has been informing me that something called a “lightsaber” might now be a possibility. The article was moderately interesting, and seemed like it might be useful. You should consider reading it.

WHAT? Lightsabers might become a reality? Oh that is so cool!

If you say so…

This invention does bring up some interesting questions, though, if they are as fully capable as the lightsabers of the Star Wars franchise.

What would happen if lightsabers were real?

1) Craft saw companies would go out of business. A sword that can cleanly cut through metal can definitely cut through a piece of wood no problem. It would also have a much nicer finished edge than the metal cut.

2) Food could be more sanitarily made. I’m looking at you, people who use their knives to cut and eat food.

3) More limbs would be missing. Habits die hard, and I’m guessing a few folks would try to eat off the blade of the “knife” they use, never mind that the blade itself can cleanly remove your tongue. And face.

4) Pocket Lightsabers, anyone? You have to admit, that would be pretty cool. Useful, too. It would be similar to a pocket knife, but more easily transportable.

5) TSA would increase even more. Soon they’d need to do some sort of search to ensure that you aren’t taking a mini lightsaber on board the plane.

There are also some questions this raises, though. In the Star Wars universe, the guns are primarily light based. We also have proof that the lightsabers are able to block and reflect the substance of light. What would a lightsaber do to a metal bullet, though? Does it instantly melt, and therefore provide extra casing for the lightsaber? Does the metal vaporize? Would anyone using an extra wide lightsaber be protected from machine gun bullets?

All of these things might be worth considering.

I hope you have a good weekend, Fluffsters!

Rainbows’ Minions: Music

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Fluffsters, we’ve got a problem.

Don’t tell me. This has something to do with your Rainbow Conspiracy…

What gave it away?

Uh, the title?

Oh. Right. Well, yes in fact! This does have to do with the rainbows.

More to the point, it has to do with the Rainbows’ hired minions: –

-Music?

You’re good!

…That’s also in the title.

Oh. Right. But yes. I have recently discovered that Rainbows probably use various pieces of music as minions. Not all music, but some pieces.

I mean, think about it. I’ve already written about how music can pop into your head at any time, and refuses to leave. I’ve referred to those as ear bugs.

Now think further about this: Some music consistently enters your mind when you see certain things or hear certain words. At least, it does for me.

Here’s an example: There’s a campfire ditty I learned. The lyrics are simple: “I see the moon//the moon sees me// the moon sees the one// I want to see. //God bless the moon// and God bless me,// and God bless the one// I want to see.” And now, whenever anyone says “I see the moon”, that little piece of music pops into my head. It’s as though it’s following me around, waiting for the opportunity to come out and demonstrate its existence. Just like rainbows.

My conclusion? Rainbows have enlisted various catchy tunes to serve as their minions. The songs receive training from the rainbows. In return, they too stalk people, always there but never observed until the opportune moment. Then they strike.

Next: People sometimes are more annoyed with songs than with rainbows, which just furthers my conclusion.

How does that follow?

Simple. You see, this provides a brilliant contrast for the rainbows.

People might realize that things popping out at them that are just waiting to be discovered are a bad thing, especially when it’s music that’s annoying and gets stuck in your head. Then, just when the poor victims feel that all hope is lost, they realize that there is something else following them that comes unannounced: Rainbows. Since people are predisposed to go “Ooh, shiny!”-

Oh, you admit that?

Yes. Now let me finish my point.

Since people are inclined to go “ooh, sparkly!” they come to the conclusion that there are two types of hidden phenomena: Music (which is creepy), and rainbows (which are the protectors of human kind.) Little do they know that actually music is just the rainbow’s minion, designed to put rainbows in a better light.

So to speak.

What?

Oh, I did make a pun there, didn’t I?

Also, I theorize that rainbows also use music to slowly drive everyone insane so that they can eventually take over the world more easily. But the primary purpose is for publicity and HR.

…Ah. I see.

So as I said, Fluffsters, we have a problem. Your task is to figure out what music you think is working for the Rainbows. Maybe, together, we can solve this problem ONCE AND FOR ALL!

Anywho, happy Thursday!

Fluff Dessert, part 2.

Fuzzy Slippers (part 2)

Slippers with and without “sticky” Soles

All-rubber Soled Slippers.

Partially Sticky Soled Slippers

Non-Sticky-Soled Slippers

Fuzzy Slippers.

Slippers that are animal-like, and slippers that are not animal-like.

What would happen if lightsabers were real?

Some ways to tell that you need coffee.