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Hello, Fluffsters! And welcome back to today’s edition of Fluffy Animals!
Oh goody. I’m soo thrilled.
Oh, good! I’m glad somebody is.
Why do I even try sarcasm. Why do I even try?
Today’s Fluffy Animal post is…
Kitties!
Yes, what kind of blog about fluff would this be if I didn’t have a post devoted to man’s worst enemy, the cat?
… Worst enemy? Really?
…Yes?
I mean, think about it. You see articles and books on how to tell if your cat is trying to kill you. You don’t see that sort of thing with dogs.
But I digress.
Information about kitties
1) They are cute. Especially when younger. After all, the only problem with kittens is that they eventually turn into cats.
2) They are useful for rodent control. Of course, if you love rodents, this is another problem. You wouldn’t want your kitten to kill a Marmot, would you?
3) Intelligence of conversation decreases as a kitten gets closer. XKCD says so, and they wouldn’t lie to us, right?
So, there you go! Happy Monday.
Seriously? That’s it?
It’s after midnight my time as I’m writing this, and I’m getting up too early my time tomorrow, which is when this is going to be posted. So, yes. I’m not responsible-
-Boy is that ever true-
-for the rest of this post. You can write more, I suppose…
All right, I will!
After all, you left out some of the best parts.
Fluffy’s perspectives on Kitties
1) They are awesome carnivores. Unlike dogs, they don’t eat carrots. At least, normal cats don’t.
2) They come in all sorts of shapes and sizes. I kid you not. There are huge cats, medium sized cats, and very small cats.
3) Some cats are celebrities. Take Grumpy Cat, for example. I’m sure you’ve heard of him her. (Can you really believe that Grumpy Cat is female? That just seems very odd. She looks like she should be male.) Or Nyan Cat.
4) Some “wildcats” are extremely cute. In fact, I’m not sure whether Ocelots and Horpadies might actually share some sort of purpose in life- being really cute and deadly at the same time.
And that is a much more reasonable fluff post- don’t you agree? I fully realize that I left many details about cats uncovered, but I think it’s still significantly better than how the Webmaster was originally going to leave it.